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 .yeah. .that about sums it up. . ♥ . :: . add memory. :: Tell a Friend :: .2 screamed. :: .wake me up.
.it's finally out. .(or so i had been told). .until today. .when i went and found. .a copy. .for myself. ( .(of myself). )
.hello strangers. i have been a bit neglectful here lately, i know. i have managed to stray away from the internet.. and abandon my livejournal in the process. (at least when it comes to posting anything of my own) so, i figured.. it was about time to send out a much needed.. long overdue update in the direction of you readers out there. but, where to begin? first off.. i finally got that damned metal removed from my face. no more wired jaw. i'm thankful it's gone.. and especially thankful i restrained myself from ripping it out on my own a few times. i'm still not completely satisfied with the results.. but i am so relieved to enjoy food again.. and i'm able to sleep comfortably now too. oh, and in case any of you were wondering.. i saved my beautiful hardware, of course. ..which i will eventually craft into jewelry of some sort. i left my crappy job behind.. and happily said goodbye to my life as a waitress. i now work at the corporate support center for texas roadhouse. the job, thanks to my wonderful friend mary liz, was presented to me this past march. i can't express how amazing the company is and how nicely things have been moving along thus far.. i have even received a promotion already and i honestly can't complain about a thing.. well, other than waking up every day at 7am.. but, it's an adjustment i'm happy to make. i moved away from j-town and settled myself comfortably in the highlands.. i now live right on grinstead.. almost directly centered between bardstown and lexington. i had debated on the idea of sharing an apartment.. sure, it'd be nice to split rent and save some cash. but, in the long run.. i decided it was best to do what i truly wanted.. to have a place of my own, on my own.. at least, for now.. a year that is. my phone finally died on me. i can't say i miss it.. we really weren't right for each other as it was. so, i mourned it for a moment and updated to a much better version. but, to clear up any confusion.. my digits are still the same. my parents are moving. i know it might seem a bit silly, but i'm really.. kinda sad about the whole situation. it's in their nature to relocate often.. so, i shouldn't be surprised.. but for some reason, i kinda am. i guess, i'm just not prepared to accept the idea.. of being in a city.. or a state.. or anywhere for that matter, that i have no family ties. but, i'm not exactly ready to leave louisville just yet.. and i can't continue to follow them to every new zip code they venture to. so, i'm sticking around a bit longer. ..they should be in knoxville by the end of july. i have a new computer.. thanks to a wonderful boyfriend. ..who i'm currently missing more than i wish i was. speaking of.. we were recently up in cincinnati.. for the ministry and revolting cocks show. it was a blast.. and my first time actually seeing ministry without being completely smashed. i did some flier work for a new sushi/sake bar downtown called 'raw'. i haven't received the final result just yet.. but once i do, i'll be sure to post something about it. i took part in the southern gothic belles finally. this was their second year to meet up.. (the first one i had to unfortunately, miss out on) and i should be receiving a few cds from that weekend, fairly soon. it's the 2nd of july.. that means i have about 12 more days until my birthday. two of my best friends should be in town around that time.. summer and christy.. us three together spells trouble.. but, i'm most definitely looking forward to it. my special day lands on a friday this year.. which is a pleasant little surprise. it also happens to be some sorta fetish party at msl.. so, looks like i'll be partying it up, goth style that night. ..go figure, right? i think that's about it.. ..at least, enough for now. i've consumed two liquor-ish flavored beverages in the time it took to type this all out.. so i believe, i'm going to wander off.. and find something else to direct my attention towards. . ♥ . .a. ps - the new phone has a camera.. and it may be crappy.. but, i'm totally addicted.  .happy july!. .from a cancerian.
Dear Passive Aggressive Closet Case, By the time you read this, I'll be hocking your jewelry. I'm sorry for doing this but, it fulfills my sadistic fantasies. I know this might comes as a bit of a shock to you - especially because you're too buried in porn to notice. But I'm sorry – I just need hot sex with someone who isn't a human potato sack. I think you're a psychopath, but I don't think we're right for each other. First of all, we're not compatible. You're a German Scat Aficionado, and I'm vastly superior to you. You like leather harnesses, you eat mayonnaise-based salads, and enjoy defrauding the elderly, and I don't like confessing my love for any of these things. Your favorite movie is The Bare Wench Project, and your favorite band is Whitesnake. Do you even know what my favorite movie or band is? I once asked you what color my eyes are and you said "Nuke me some fucking hash browns!". Anyway, I want to date the first drunk barfly who'll talk to me. But you know what? I still want to be stalked. We can totally file restraining orders . We had some good times, or so it looks on the videotape (even though I'm passed out) . But please, don't get all John Wayne Gacy like last time. That means no spiteful genital tattoos. And look - I won't even make an issue out of the $37,229 you owe me, or the fact that you dissected my Dalmatian. So take care of yourself - and enjoy prison. Yours In Contempt, .amanda. P.S. I faked every orgasm. . ♥ . http://www.chickenhead.com/stuff/dearjo . tag: chixor1 . venomiss . mommabunny .
this entry is inspired by my friend and co-worker, jill. she recently sent out a bulletin on myspace.. a look at valentine's day, in a very negative light. after responding, i felt inspired to write a bit more on the subject. some people put entirely too much emphasis on valentine's day. which can be a good thing.. or in some cases.. a very bad thing. i believe, today is just another day to express love.. we all get caught up in one thing or another, from time to time.. school, work, life in general.. today is intended for you to remind yourself.. it's important to take the time to make sure those that you love.. know how much they mean to you. tomorrow holds no promises. you'll have to excuse me for sounding so sentimental.. this will only get more mushy.. so, you may want to stop reading now. we've all been scorned.. some more than others. perhaps, you had a horrible past valentine's day.. or you spent it with someone you'd rather never be reminded of. well, there's a reason why it's called 'the past'. move on. by living your life the same way.. you're not learning anything. rather, you've allowed someone to effect you in such a way.. that you're still living through it. but i wouldn't call it living, exactly. i think some people just need something to be negative about. ..and that's fine. everyone's entitled to voice their own opinions. it'd be a little hypocritical of me to say otherwise. valentine's day is not just about having a significant other. sure, if you do have someone.. it does focus much of your attention on who you'd like to spend it with. i have someone that i love dearly.. but, he isn't the only person i would go out on a limb for. love is universal. i've heard it argued.. love shouldn't revolve around one day. but, who says it has to? that's another's conviction and it's entirely self-opinionated. there are too many people that down this holiday for that very reason. perhaps, they're looking at it too sternly. quit picking it apart. if you look at all the other holidays out there the same way, you'll see they're all pretty petty when it comes down to it. i want presents all year 'round.. not only on christmas. but, i do receive gifts outside of christmas. some christians only attend church on easter. but, some christians actually do attend service at their own free will. families should get together because they want to.. not just because it happens to be thanksgiving. but, some families do spend time together outside of holidays. i want to dress up all year 'round, not only on halloween.. and i do. i try to have halloween as often as possible, regardless of what month it is. personally, i like valentine's day.. then again, i like every holiday. i love easter and christmas, and i'm not a christian. i love st. patrick's day, and i'm barely irish. i love the 4th of july, but i'm really not all that patriotic. i guess i view things a little differently. i enjoy valentine's day because i believe in love. well, that and look around you.. there are hearts everywhere.. cuddly animals and boxes of chocolates.. everything is pink and red with white lacey trim.. fat little cherubs and scented candles.. how can you argue with all that? it's fun, just the way a holiday should be. you don't have to live your life by a calendar. those days are there, not to tell us what to do.. but act more as reminders. ..and keeping in the spirit of reminders. ♥ .happy valentine's day, everyone. ♥  .a.
.it's 10am and i still haven't gone to bed yet. .i don't know how much longer i can keep this up. .my head is spinning. .racing. .oh precious sleep. .don't you miss the good times we've had?. .i'm convinced. .my bed must be to blame. .perhaps it's haunted. .anyways. .in these early hours. .i'm quite bored. .which is to be expected. .so i've been playing around. .and as a result, i've made something. .thought i'd share. ( .tickler. ) ♥
.this thing is long overdue. .for an update. ..and i'm sure there is lots i could say. .but i'm really not up to typing it all out at the moment. .so, until i do actually put forth the effort. .i'll entertain you all, visually. .i haven't been sleeping very well. .which is no surprise. .but instead of wasting my time away doing absolutely nothing. .i cleaned, cropped and uploaded an assload of photos. .i'm not really sure if there is such a thing as an 'assload'.. .but if there is, i have most definitely defined it with this. .so if your bored. .have some time to spare. .and enjoy looking at pretty images. .then i encourage you.. go and browse around. .and do leave me some comments. .where-ever you deem worthy.. .you know. .it is the polite thing to do.  .eye candy. ♥
.wow. i've got entirely too many clothes.. and it wasn't until recently.. that i became fully aware of that statement. it was james' sister that, in some way.. forced me to come to terms with my addiction.. by donating to it. natatlie has passed in my direction.. three huge garbage bags full of clothing. i was so excited to rummage through and try everything on. like a junkie.. i couldn't get the stuff out of the bags quick enough. ..and 70% of everything i liked, fit. now the question is, where do i put it all? it only makes sense to clear out a lot of what i already own. so i've been trying very hard.. to reasonably go through my dressers and closets.. clean them out and rid myself of the extras i've been holding onto. however, there is just one small thing. i have a serious problem.. with the very idea of letting go, of my precious clothes. i can throw out a lot of stuff and not look back.. in fact, that's what i do. as i've gotten older, i've come to let go of things much easier.. and i totally believe in striving to be a minimalist. but clothing is my downfall.. it's something different all-together. my clothing gets very special treatment.. i even prefer people to return my things unwashed, so i can do it myself. .which brings me to question. i know.. it's just clothing, most of which i don't wear too often.. some of which, i probably won't ever wear again.. and there's always going to be something new i like, something new i want.. so, why am i so attached to something that's nothing more than just fabric? is this strictly a female quality and if so.. does the entire gender obtain this ridiculous trait.. and why? and how in the hell do i even begin to break myself of it? i don't think i could handle just stopping cold turkey.. i've gone too far. i'd have to wean myself slowly.. gradually. i'm sure everyone out there has something they 'collect'.. something they couldn't imagine letting go of.. even if, deep down.. they know it wouldn't make any real significant difference to be rid of. i wonder how that's determined though.. maybe, for me.. it's a financial issue. knowing how much i've spent.. and wanting to get my money's worth, so to speak. perhaps i have some emotional connection to clothing.. that stems from my never ending desire to forever be spoiled.. and somewhat childlike and stubborn in my ways. lol, ok that's a bit far-fetched. ..it could be, i'm just being a stupid girl. the solution being.. i need to just show my excessiveness into a bag.. and give it away before i have any time to think about it. you know.. i bet they have support groups for people like me.. .shoppers anonymous. they probably meet up in locations far from town.. no shopping plazas or malls around to tempt them. they chainsmoke and drink coffee like it's going out of style. i'd go, probably.. but, i haven't a thing to wear. speaking of new things to wear.. they removed the wires in my mouth and replaced them with rubber bands. so, i have these pseudo-braces now. it's easier to speak and to be understood.. which is nice.. even if i had finally perfected the art of mumbling. i'm supposed to start exercising my jaw.. and i've been trying, a little. i need to try harder though. i'm trying to look at it this way.. the sooner i start, the closer i will be to all this metal being gone. but fuck, it hurts. i'll get serious and do as the doctor orders.. i promise. i'll start first thing.. tomorrow.  BUTTERFLY EYES You have Butterfly Eyes! Positive Traits: Thoughtful, Intelligent, Humble, Clever, Open Minded Negative Traits: Elitist, Conceited, Apathetic, Cold, Sarcastic Your eyes are the windows to your soul. What type of eyes do you have? brought to you by Quizilla
.i know some of you are on the darkmoon photography group. .which means, you've already seen this. ..but.. .for those of you who haven't. .i just received a new picture. .it's from the gore shoot we did awhile back. .i had so much fun playing with all the fake blood. .i can't wait to do it again. ( .♥. ) |
